Why I think YOU should vote for Donald Drumpf
By Virginia Carraway Stark
There’s a lot you probably don’t know about Donald Drumpf and I think once you hear some more about him and where he’s coming from you’re going to have to totally re-evaluate how you feel about him!
Donald’s Drumpf’s father Frederick Christ Trump, or just Fred for short, was involved with the civil rights movement by being an active member of the Klu Klux Klan. He’s always been a believer in fighting for what he thinks is the right and equitable treatment for all. When he was in his early 20’s he was arrested when over 1000 KKK members got into a brawl with the New York Police. Boy Howdy! It’s hard to keep a Good Drumpf Down!
He was a real estate developer too, that’s where all that Drumpf money comes from! Real Estate!
He was active in civil rights in this area as well, making sure that he would only rent his apartment and condos to the whitest people around. In fact, black renters were sent in as a test to see if he would rent to renters with the perfect financial and credit record and the answer was still a resounding ‘no’! In case you wondered where he got his ‘You’re Fired!’ epithet from I would say that Fred Christ Drumpf would be a good place to find out!
If you look up Freidrich Drumpf you will learn that he is the one who changed his family’s German name from Drumpf to Trump. I guess he figured out Trump trumped Drumpf… or something. I’m not sure from Freidrich Drumpf would have thought of the change of name. Freidrich was Donny’s grandfather.
We’ve already seen from Fred Drumpf that the family is filled with fighters, so the German government’s assertions that Freidrich Drumpf was a coward and a draft dodger are surely misrepresented. Freidrich had a lot of reasons why he was conveniently out of the country and was unable to help anyone fight. After the war was over, Freidrich was ready to come home only to find that Germany didn’t want him.
Rejected from his home country he was forced to become an American Citizen despite all his best efforts to stay German (and the dodge drafting rumors were false! False I tell you! Germany, You’re Fired!).
Freidrich refused to stay down and opened saloons and brothels across the land. He made sure that he had prostitutes aplenty that he exploited to the max to make sure that the little Drumpf’s would have money to invest in real estate when they grew in Drumpfle sized Drumpfs.
He had a good reason to do this since his restaurants weren’t built on land that belonged to him. What a step up for little Donny when he got to build Trump Tower on his own piece of ill-gotten land! Things have changed a lot for the Drumpf clan but Donald Drumpf still remembers his roots. He might not serve horse meat for every meal like his grandfather did at his restaurants, but the good old days of racism and exploiting women are still cherished to this day.
So stop hemming and hawing America! Vote Donald Drumpf for your next president! He knows how to pillage and pilfer and will make sure to leave you without two horses to scrape together but you’ll be doing the world a service. All differences will be forgotten as the whole world unites in one opinion: That’s one hell of a Drumpf you’ve got there, America and nobody is going to Trump that!